Archive for October, 2007

gold diggers + arm candy eaters

I think the tendency of these two types of pond scum to mate just cleans up the dating pool for normal people.

May their soulless unions thrive!

About a Girl

If Nick Hornby’s middle-aged single guys are boys, then I suppose in this context I am a girl. (Not that I want to be; I was just remarking to a friend how people used to give men shit for referring to women as “girls”; now it seems completely acceptable. Why did that start being OK again? It’s so retro in a bad way, it makes me think of “the girls in the secretarial pool.”)

But like Hornby’s immature protagonist, I like dating single parents. I’m pretty much off online dating, but this Times piece points out that for all its faults, it is a jungle stocked with my preferred prey.

more on speed-dating over Webcam plus Jennifer Egan shout-out

I’m less of a fuddy-duddy than the Gray Lady on this one: Of COURSE you can’t make a meaningful connection in a “brief, Web-brokered Internet chat session” — duh. But you get the info you get online plus the let’s-face-it-important information of how he looks and sounds in motion.

Since I last posted, I saw Skype for the first time. A couple friend of mine who’s separated use it every night, and I was over visiting one of them when they Skyped. The Times guy is right that it wasn’t a flattering picture, but it is better than nothing. Interestingly, I got the sense that these lovebirds do their phone sex over the regular phone rather than flashing each other on the Webcams.

Re the Times guy’s objection that Webcams invite exhibitionism, again, duh, and so what. My gay hairdresser told me that in his, er, circles, everyone has their Webcam pointed downwards and just cuts right to the chase. I asked if there was the technology for a wider-angle shot, so you could get face and body in one frame, and he wrinkled his nose and said, “What kind of weirdo would want his face in the shot?”

Here’s another blogger who’s with me, for slightly different reasons.

On the subject of exhibitionism, relationship to images, identity, etc., I just finished Jennifer Egan’s 2001 novel Look at Me, and wildly recommend it. I feel so lame that I’m just now getting around to reading her novels, in order, as it turns out; I loved The Invisible Circus, then devoured Look at Me, and am very excited for the new one The Keep.

virtual speed dating

A lot of people I interviewed in 2003 and 2004 said web cams were the next big thing in online dating; these Stanford kids are combining web cams with online dating with speed dating.

As gimmicks go, the sum seems an improvement on the parts, slightly less excruciating than real-life speed-dating where all the others are jostling in your peripheral vision (I bet if I did it, I’d keep losing focus on my own mini-date while trying to eavesdrop) and giving a structure to web cam interactions with strangers.

Also seems a little like an open mic night; I imagine speed daters have more canned performances online than in person.

I’d love to hear from someone who tries this service what it’s like.

masculinity and its discontents

first my online dating guru rival weighs in on Maureen Dowd’s question of why fabulous successful women can’t get dates

and relatedly, guys show an ostrich who da man.

what’s a vilde chaya?

and do we think Rebel is a man or a woman?

What a fascinating corner of the blogosphere!

with enough tech….

humans can upgrade themselves to dogs sniffing each other’s pee, and hopefully, butts.

online dating on work intranet

this is so wrong on so many levels! (A) You shouldn’t date co-workers (say many, I don’t know if I agree) and even if you do then (B) isn’t that one place you don’t need online dating?

And even from The Man’s prospective, it seems nuts. If the goal is indeed to increase worker productivity, having your employees online date ain’t gonna get you there.

stop making sense

this blog post about Christian Dating seems to be written in tongues.

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